Damage everywhere I turn

Can I bring good into the world?
Or can I only bring pain?
Can I do good?
I swear I only cause others pain no matter what I do
I damage the ones I love
And cause a catastrophic disaster at every home I end up in
Is their no hope for me?
Is their only dark despair?
I cause pain to those I get close to
I was kicked out at 19 for the pain I caused my family
Before that my family died
I can't help but think did I cause that to happen too?
Can I only do damage?
I live in a dark hole of space
Maybe that's where I need to be
So no one can be hurt anymore
Everyone tells me no it's not your fault
But what if I am a virus
Meant to kill the joy of everyone I come in contact with
Maybe it's because of the life I have lived
But there is damage everywhere I turn
And I caused it
I wrecked havoc
Then I destroyed the only love left in the hearts of the souls who loved me
I burn down bridges that were built by others without trying
Am I a deadly disease that has come out after many years?
A disease that was hiding and hibernating waiting for the right moment to emerge?
Will I be the fire that burns those that get close to save the souls trapped within the burning building?
I see that I cause damage and fear everywhere I turn
Those that risk their lives for me always lose something in return
They lose freedom
They lose a happy life
I always damage them
I always take it away
Like the eviction people come to take the home
Is this what my life is supposed to be?
I am now with yet another kind group of souls
They took me when I had no place else to go
Will I destroy their lives too?
Will I be the death of their happiness like that of the ones before them?
Will their happiness wilt like a red rose shriveling up and turning black?
What did they lose in place of coming to get me?
I won't know..
All I know is..
I am only capable of causing disasters
It's only a matter of time before it happens again

This poem is about: 
Me

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