DANGEROUS MOOD

Man I done tryed everything I could ,

I done told the truth ,

At all times ,

I joke joke ,

But one thing I’m not good at is lying ,

I let you cool off. 

I gave you space ,

Shit I gave you years ,

I even tryed taking responsibility for my actions,

I could have said I was just a child acting out of pain ,

I could have said ‘ ! those things because you let me get rape ,

You did nothing ,

I mean yea you prolly wanted to kill my mother boyfriend,

But was you really there. 

I don’t mean working & coming home to a house we lived in ,

We not talking about the times you went up side my head ,

Or how you never once stood beside me ,

Or how you believe everybody over me 

You said I was lair when in reality you are the lair ,

You the one that don’t stand on your word ,

You the one that put hate for you in my heart ,

You the one stop begin my father 1st,

Before I could ever stop begin your daughter,

You never once ask me how I felt about you begin married ,

You the one that gave up on me before I could run away ,

Run the streets,

Join a gang ,

You never once cared about how I lost you as father ,

You never once apologized for saying fuck me ,

It’s like you got marry & said fuck me ,

Over & over again , 

How you mad I wouldn’t let you keep abusing me ,

Questioning my worth ,

Asking why I wasn’t good enough to be your daughter,

Why I didn’t matter , 

But did I thru that shit up in your face ,

Nah I didn’t I suffer in silence,

Yes it’s true when you say off the wall shit I say painful shit ,

Shit how you think I feel ,

Watching you be there for my step brothers & sisters on hand & feet ,

You let them kids get away with your much because they whooped your ass,

Because you couldn’t do nothing to them ,

Guess who he took out on me ,

They gonna say otherwise now but I know what I seen ,

I know what I seen with my own cricket eye ,

I wasn’t blind to what was going on around me ,

I was very much aware,

Shit I came up with ways to leave that house ,

 I wasn’t scared to live that house ,

I wasn’t scared to run the streets ,

I wasn’t scared at all ,

At my young age ,

I read ready  for what ever & whoever ,

I fought people that had a birth Parent in their life ,

See y’all saw what y’all wanted to see ,

Because if you was really paying attention you

Would know it’s deeper than what you think ,

Man I be trynna let you in on my life for so long ,

To point I’m drained ,

I can’t talk to you about it ,

The man that step up to the plate to be my father is dead ,

Like come on man when this shit gonna end ,

See my father not here no more to judge file your actions,

You quick to run your lips at me. 

But can’t even stand up & be my father ,

Man that all I ever wanted ,

That’s all I would ever ask ,

Man if that’s too much to ask for then idk what to say ,

This shit got me in a dangerous mood ‼️