dark days ahead

And then it hit me;
you never loved me. 
You don’t treat 
someone you loved like that. 
You took me for granted. 
I'm sorry
I was never good enough.
I'm sorry
I cried too much 
and hurt too easily. 
I'm sorry
that I don't feel any sympathy for you now. 
because honestly, 
you fucked yourself. 
I was the only person 
who stood beside you, 
the only person 
to love you 
through your darkest thought,
your most dreadful nightmare 
and I supported you. 
I knew your flaws 
and I loved you all the same. 
I dreamt about forever with you.
And now, 
I do not wish 
for you anymore. 

My soul is empty. 
You’ve taken everything from me. 
However, someday,
my heart will be filled again. 
I will discover
someone who cares for me 
like I cared for you. 
Someone who will take the time 
to break down 
the walls 
that you made me build, 
someday, 
someone will save me 
from the monster you created.

But for now,
you've destroyed who I am, 
leaving me empty, 
and lifeless. 
You broke me. 
I have nothing left to give, 
no pity, 
no sorrow,
no second chances. 
And it's taken me quite some time
to realize 
your soul is empty too, 
but not like mine.
Yours is black, 
and hard,
and impossible to love. 
but I was the exception...

Nobody will ever again treat you 
like you put the stars in the sky. 
Nobody will ever 
look at you 
with pure and innocent amazement
like I once did. 
Nobody will be there to care. 
I hope that every morning 
you wake up with regret.
I hope you look
in the mirror utterly disgusted 
with the creature 
staring back at you. 
I hope you hate 
who you've become.
That shallow, 
selfish human being 
who doesn’t give a shit 
about anyone but himself. 
I do not wish for you to be happy. 
I did when I thought
I meant something to you. 
Now, 
I wish for you to 
suffer the pain 
I have felt everyday.
I wish for you to 
cry yourself to sleep at night
wishing you were good enough.
You never will be.
I wish for you to lose your appetite 

the moment a memory of us 

flashes through your mind. 
I wish you to be lonely,
and afraid 
like I was.

I hope you will someday 
feel the way I felt;
trapped in this darkness 
you’ve created. 
No love, 
no passion,
no light. 
You are a coward, 
always escaping. 
You will never be a man. 
You cannot face your fears.
and I've given up.
You lie 
and cheat 
and somehow always manage to win. 

I promise you, 
your days of darkness await you.