Darkness Inside

I hide with the fear inside 

with the darkness that was a friend

This lead me astray 

but loved me so

I could not tell you how

but I just know 

until I found some light

to lead me on 

in a way that would make me proud

to have a better dream

and leave that darkness 

who was actually not a person to love

that kept me from becoming what I see for me.

to live a life I know that was right for me.

I loved you darkness

but you 

I guess 

had no love for me

I saw you as my angle 

but you are just the devil

that heart I thought was mine 

was nothing but stone

I saw the truth behind it all

without my head in the clouds 

and my heart now filled with joy

instead of the norm

I could not remember the time 

since I laughed 

but could count every tear

every heart break

it all comes to mind 

when I think of you darkness

you shall never have me 

I am on my own

no fear of you 

not wanting what you have

or ever had 

I like myself how I am now 

without you in my life

not giving a damn 

I wish I could say you were a good mom 

but that is a lie

you may have shaped my life 

on what I don´t want to be 

but to be different from you

you had no shame 

I can´t call you a mother 

but I could call you my darkness

lurking to strike me down 

to push me to where you are

with no love for anyone 

but yourself 

in all

I don´t want to be held down

by anyone

expesially you

because you never loved me