Day Today

Day Today

Memories, no matter what I do,

How much I try

How many times I’ve cried

Or the countless times I’ve said bye

It’s these memories that I can’t seem to live through.

They cloud my judgments, and deprive me from life

They serve as reminders of that time

When I was petrified to blink an eye

I would try to preoccupy myself

To turn a blind eye

But all I did was mollify him

As I sat there defenseless and terrified

How many times have I asked, was it I?

Was I too sly?

How many times have I asked, why I mummified my feelings?

Why didn’t I squeak, resist, cry, or scream?

Why did I remain silent and tongue-tied?

When all I felt was despair and misery

When asked what had happened,

I chose to disqualify

You see I wanted to justify his actions

Didn’t want to break my family

So I chose to lie

In order to unify my family

To nullify my fears and preoccupy myself

I smiled despite the pain

Talked when all I wanted was to scream

Walked when I wished to fled

Lived when I wished to disappear

Memories, no matter what I do

How much I lie

How many times I’ve fortified

Or the countless times I’ve tried to modified

It’s these memories that I can’t seem to live without

So instead I choose to live day today

To focus on each breath I take

To remind myself that I have the power to take control of my destiny

I wont be a victim anymore,

Maybe, just maybe it’s these memories that will feed me the strength for empowerment