Dear Anxiety

Dear Anxiety, 

Thank you

For protecting me. 

I know how much you care, 

and how hard you work 

To make sure that I am always 

Fitting in, 

Working hard, 

And staying on top of things. 

I know that you know more than me 

Regarding future things 

And you are always prepared on how to handle them. 

You care so much about me 

That you tell me I can always be 

Better. 

I can always work 

Harder, 

And I can always offer 

More. 

Being “okay” is not enough, 

So you push me to be 

Perfect. 

But you know that being perfect still has room for improvement, 

So you never let me slack off, 

You never let me rest 

To ensure that I am exactly who you want me to be. 

When I start to get comfortable in my own skin 

You remind me why that’s not okay. 

Because I should always strive to be like everyone else 

In order to survive in this world. 

You have stuck by me 

Through confusing times 

Giving me resources to analyze every word, 

Every action, 

And every look that others give me, 

Guiding me to figure out exactly what it is that makes me different from them, 

And how I can change 

To be them. 

You make sure that I am loved by taking over 

Who I am and replacing it with who you are. 

You know that I am not strong enough to handle my self, 

So you have taken that burden into your own hands. 

Anxiety, 

I know that you care about me. 

I know that you are keeping me safe. 

And you are willing to do it all on your own. 

You protect me from emotions that Distract me. 

You keep your wisdom on me at all times. 

You are in control. 

You make my life easier. 

Better. 

Happier. 

Anxiety, 

You tell me that I am not good enough 

Without you. 

So you promise me

You will never leave me. 

Even when I get angry with you. 

You say it is just because I am tired. 

It’s just because I cannot see what you can see. 

But, Anxiety, 

I hate you. 

I hate you for destroying me. 

I’m ready now, 

I can take care of myself. 

Anxiety, you’re hurting me. 

You’ve thrown away my joy. 

Anxiety, I can’t feel anything anymore. 

You’ve pushed me too hard. 

Anxiety, stop controlling me. 

Just go take a little break. 

Anxiety, leave me alone. 

You are not who I need to be. 

Anxiety, just let go.  

-

You

Don’t 

Get to

Define

Me.