Dear Attractive Man

Dear Attractive Man,

It all began one winter’s day

When I trotted through the glass doors

And my round blue eyes locked on yours

Dark and deep as fungal decay

I had to move my tongue by force

          To speak my reason for coming

In my words I wound up biting

Back how perfect a face was yours.

One might consider this creeping

But I know you will understand

How love must meet certain demands

Like seeing your home by stalking

I skip with joy and trembling hands

Their palms often get quite moist

At the soft tenor of your voice

Quick! hide to avoid reprimand.

I promise that I’ve made a choice

To not be extremely creepy

Just know I’ll be watching sweetly

Without making a single noise.

If you find yourself lonely dear

Just know that I’ll always be near.

Love,

       Your Biggest Fan