Dear Dad

Dear Dad, this is me

Do you recognize the person you see?

Do you remember who I am?

I’m one of the children you abused

One of the children you used

You don’t remember which one I am

I’m the second oldest, the one that didn't look like you,

Like that could explain everything you wanted and did do

I’m the one that you kept trying to break,

I’m the child you tried to strangle in December of ‘98

The child you tried to drown in the summer of ‘04

I’m the one that got up every time you knocked me down

I’m the one who took the longest to cry

‘Cause I didn’t want you to enjoy seeing the tears fall from my eyes

I’m the one who cared for the younger kids when mom went to work

You did nothing when you where home but beat up us kids and watch T.V

So, do you remember me?

I want to let you know

That I’m letting the past go

That I’m going to forgive but never forget

I forgive myself for not being strong enough to call the police

I forgive myself for being a scared little kid

I forgive myself for everything I couldn’t prevent

 I forgive myself for hoping it would only get better

And I forgive you for being a weak person, a sorry excuse of a dad

I forgive you for being a monster even though, you were the only father we had

But I will never forget what you did to us

What you did to me

Etched forever in my nightmares and memories

So, do you remember me?