Dear David- A Poem of Catharses

Dear David,

You thought you could break me with your words that leave bruises   

and your hands that leave scars, but I am not a clay pot that will shatter when dropped

I am a flower, the more shit you throw on me the taller I’ll grow

and you used to be the sun I needed to shine but you saw my success as your eclipse

You were the air that I breathed, I needed you to survive

but I learned that I am the only person I can ever depend upon.

I loved you and the attention you gave me, but I came to realize through time

that it was simply the

attention

I loved, and

not you.

You had me hooked, I was falling over my feet trying to catch all your words so I wouldn’t miss a thing, when I should have been running, sprinting, the other way. But we never see the light until we’re out of the deepest part of the pit. So I

kept falling, kept craving, kept needing.

I am the only girl I know who can say she stayed dating her rapist.

Because I didn’t think you were hurting me, I thought it was love, I thought my body

belonged to you, but my body belongs to no one.

My hands are mine and mine alone to hold me.

My curves are not yours to touch. My lips are not yours to force. I am not yours to force.

You thought you could get away with hurting me but I will not submit to you anymore I’m not the weak girl you took advantage of and convinced you cared about

She grew up and became a woman who will not tolerate your dominance

a moment longer. That trusting, naive child is gone, and she became a badass bitch who will ruin your life if you try and cross her again.

But thank you for something David.

Thank you for showing me that I will never, NEVER, rely on a man for happiness again.

I will never put myself in a position where I am reliant. I am the

only

person I need

and I know that now.

So good luck in this cynical world you’ve created for yourself.

I refuse to let hate run my life, so I don’t hate you.

I’m indifferent.

You are not a

single

thought

that crosses through my mind.

You no longer live in my brain- you’re a stranger there.

This is the last time I will ever say your name.

Sincerely,

A survivor.