Dear Heart,

Endlessly, I have always felt from you. And also your squeezes and beats. Your skips. Leaps.  

From a young girl, I have felt the squeeze at a small gesture of kindness. At something so simple, I never thought I could feel your response. I became aware of your growth. 

Later on, there was a beating in my chest.  

"Well, this is new," I directed toward you, with a smirk. You beat back, your thump hitting my breast bone in rapid succession. I smiled. 

As I grew and was aware of your sayings, I became more courageous. I never thought myself to be charismatic and loving, like the girls who looked so lovely and charming, but I tried in my own way to be loved. You would skip when meeting new people, for it proposed the chance to connect deeper with anyone. Would we ever find someone willing to learn with us? 

These times darkened. There weren't many people at this age that were as aware of their hearts as we are. I want to apologize for hurting you so much in that time. But I still do believe we both came out stronger. And I think it was good to do that all early, for life would be harsher to us in the future and experience was needed.  

However, clouded in my dark journey, I looked past those around me. Who willingly gave their hearts. Among them, my best friend. Who knew he'd be so willing to grow as I was. He was also to first to leap for me. In turn, I would leap for him, too. 

I also realized if I never understood this feeling, I would ultimately become small. I would never find out anything. And as much as I love to live inside of you, I still have the rest of my body. I still have the air that emits from me. The body language I use. People to meet. People to move on from. There is a world apart from in you.  

Although I have expanded beyond the capacity of just using your beats and skips to measure at what point of my life I am at, I will never forget what you did for me. You gave the chance to become the courageous person I am today. This allowed me to move on from those who would never stray away from their own Hearts. You made me realize that there was more than just you. There were others. Others that felt like I did. And that's how I met him. And understood him. And came to love him. 

Thank you for your guidance. I will always remember you. Don't worry. It is true you are no longer in my care. It is true I hold someone else's heart. But he now has you. He will take care of you, as I take care of his. We will all be together until the end.  
 

Beloved, 

Estefanie