dear melanie

Dear Melanie,

    It gets easier.

    All that time and tears put into silly work you thought determined your future and let determine the depth of your day. Essays, math problems, standardized testing does not define who you are. I find pity looking back and seeing how much it affected you but I am here to tell you it gets easier and that now you are thriving with opportunities. Simply learn to breathe and remain optimistic. It’s one of the only things I admire about you. The optimism.

     All that frustration built caused by your distrusting/complicated/overwhelming parents calms down. I know they hurt you. Don’t get angry , —they do it out of love. All those arguments and degrading comments —come out of love.

   Their approach of parenting was questionable , and it angered you for it made you feel like an unwanted mistake.

     Truth is you made them so proud , it was themselves they thought as flawed and only wanted you to engrave your own footsteps instead of following theirs. Frankly you can’t help but appreciate them for pushing you so much to a better future, all those nights you dreamt of leaping off into the world is what helped you stay on track for success, now they miss you and you miss them. Therefore, remain patient. It is not yet to be over and your parents were the least of your stress.

   Finally, all the late nights with your thoughts consuming you until you cry hysterically and yet quietly at the same time. You are your worst enemy and this nonstop battle needs to come to an end. I wish I could tell you that it has but this battle rests in your own hands and it is you who determines when it does. You’ve been through more than anyone can imagine but it is time to let go. Swords down , quit fighting.

    In the end there’s not a lot anyone can tell you that you don’t already know, you knew it would be easier from the beginning. You knew that with pain comes ease.