Dear Past Me

January 21, 2018

Dear 13-year-old me,

Here's something to keep in mind.

You're going to spend too many months

Thinking you have worth you have yet to find.

You are more than that tiny number

Showing up on the scale

And more than how many thin red lines

Appear on your arms when you believe you've failed.

Dear 14-year-old me,

You're starting to see through the two-way glass.

It isn't a mirror, it's a window, a door,

And through it, to the next chapter, you've begun to pass.

Your voice is louder than any number of whispers

If you'd only let yourself use it

You know it's when you stay in your own head

That you feel like you're about to lose it.

Dear 15-year-old-me,

There is something about control.

It's a nagging feeling when you eat

That you need to be empty to feel whole.

For every panic attack

You feel a little more scared.

You are stronger than you think and it will do you no good

To isolate yourself from those who care.

Dear 16-year-old me,

Something seems a bit off.

Your friends and teachers keep telling you

They're here when you need to talk.

I'm proud of you for standing up to your thoughts

And realizing you deserve better.

Baby steps, small victories...

It's a long road but we're walking it together.

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