Denial (Self Defense)

I became an agent of the dark,

Broke in to your ‘vault’ with a knife in my hand…

Just in case… a weapon for self -defense…

I knew I was not any good in attack but I was going to fake a try

Sure of the reward for honesty,

So rough that honest people have to deal with broken bones and freezing brains

I had a twisted heart, twisting it further would peel it to bleed out,

I cautiously walked in, like a thief in the dark…

With a torch, I keenly walked through the shelves of your brain,

Trying to find out if you kept traces of my existence

I found your thoughts and expectations on me

So I put my gloves so as not to leave prints in-case I turn your brain to a crime scene

I went in to the details of your files on me

Scheming through details of how you missed me,

How you wish for more and how womanly you wanted to feel

I gathered confidence like a barrister with evidence

Hoping you would easily plead guilty as charged

Instead, you charged me with the urge to tell

And I couldn’t because unlike you,

I handle hearts with care and telling with not only break it,

But crush it to sudden death

But just in case I do, don’t call it pay back

Because that pain-debt you lent me was too much

Too much that even with a double edged sword,

I couldn’t double-cut the pain to reduce the cost

So just in case I happen to rape your confidence out

Just in case I solidify your hidden molten heart

Then drop it to crack,

For I will avoid a high five for a fifth date

A fifth date in front of a five judge bench

Just know it was in self defense