Denying you

You have no idea.
You were it for me.
My life was full of meaningless conversation,
Empty collisions between my lips and a couple different strangers.
You gave me a feeling ive only ever read about.
Now this emotion,
I refuse to carry it out,
I'll deny it, time and time again.
Its what i do
I love people,
I'll make them feel special
Without needing anything in return.
But that day...
You made my insides burn,
Never in my life had i felt a concern,
I thought it was my turn.
I saw,
You were aware.
So i tried
to convince myself that you didnt care.
I tried
To deny it time and time again.
But i did what i do best,
I made you feel invincible,
Like you were one of a kind
Just like the rest.
Maybe it was own kind of acid test.
And i tried,
So damn hard not to convince myself with a false notion.
That never letting you know,
was all because i wanted you to confess your emotion.
That never letting you know,
there was a difference between you and them...
About that feeling..
And why I denied it time and time again.
Truth is,
I was scared.
Just know that no one else has ever compared.

This poem is about: 
Me

Comments

Need to talk?

If you ever need help or support, we trust CrisisTextline.org for people dealing with depression. Text HOME to 741741