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Despair


Dear despairing (your name),

I hope we never need this letter,
but we probably will down the road.
 
Trust me,
I know how you feel.
I know how much pain you're in.
I know you're confused about God
and about His character.
Where exactly on the spectrum of love and discipline, 
tender-hearted and tough-minded,
and coddle and push,
He lies.
I know you feel like God is just sitting in heaven, 
watching you,
making you endure pain,
not letting you go to heaven just yet.
I know He doesn't feel like your loving Father anymore.
 
I'm so sorry, love.
 
Do you remember writing this letter?
Two days after lowering your antidepressants from 10 mg, 
to 5.
We were in a good place.
God reminded us of Him when Fine By Me played in Ross Dress For Less.
 
Knowing your faith is struggling,
remember that God is with you.
We can say this with full confidence.
Remember that God heals the brokenhearted
and binds up their wounds.
That He is near to the brokenhearted
and saves those crushed in spirit.
That you are blessed to have such sorrow
for you will be comforted.
That God knows you, love,
every part of you.
 
Bring your feelings to Him.
Sadness,
anger,
hurt,
abandonment,
grief,
all of it.
You are weary and heavy-laden,
so go to Him.
Rest your soul in Him.
Don't be afraid to tell Him how you feel,
He is patient.
When we call Him,
He answers.
When we're in trouble,
He is with us.
 
Don't turn your back on Him.
(He's the best thing that's ever happened to us!)
He will never leave you or forsake you.
He has promised this.
As a mother comforts her child,
so He will comfort you.
 
Remember when it was easy to have faith in Him?
Strive for that child-like heart again.
He is still your loving Father,
and He has not abanonded you.
 
I love you,
Hopeful (your name)

 

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