"Destroyer of Me"

Dear Destroyer of Me,

You think the world's bleak 

and your glasses, tinted gray.

You engulf me, make me weak

so there's naught I can do but stay.

You consume the joy I find

in the skill I've fought to gain.

To others, I can't be kind--

each nicety I must feign.

A theif of biblical proportions--

if only such texts I could believe. 

Your "faith" is a hideous abortion

of the ideas others find as reprieve.

You make me alone in a crowded room--

no friends, no family, no light.

You make me beg for an ending, soon--

you sap my will to fight.

The worst part?

You are an invisible monster.

None can see you but I.

Any semblence of a connection I try to foster

is deliverance nigh. 

The world thinks I'm you--

they call me the monster I hate.

"You're negative, boring, rude!"

further dilapidates my state.

You force me to wear a mask

to hide the wounds that you inflict.

You make living each day a task

that feels so easy to quit.

Life feels so much longer

than the 18 years it's been. 

I can't tell if I'm getting stronger

or just developing thicker skin.

The world isn't a friendly place

to us with messed-up brains. 

We're told we're a simple disgrace

the the world we entertain.

Each day is a song and dance

to make comfortable those around us

because healthy minds refuse to chance

feeling the pain I've learned to trust. 

You take so many others like me

from a world which is unwelcome.

Even in death, no one sees

that for us, joy is seldom.

The one good I can say

your wretched existence wreaks

is that I am stronger still 

than those who call me weak.

You may be a monster

and I may be just a girl

but I am more stubborn, stronger

and to your will I will not curl.

It is difficult to distinguish

where you end and I begin. 

Even so, you won't extinguish

the light that's always been.

You're a creature on my shoulder

and you'll be with me forever.

Depression's your name, you're strong, but I'm bolder--

and I will give up never.

In pure hatred of all you've tried to destroy,

Your Survivor