Devastate or Motivate

A few written words,

All it took to unhinge me.

After all, wasn’t this

The worst possible outcome

That I dreaded entirely?

I should have crumbled,

A straw house in the wind,

Thinking up tornadoes of my own.

How could I not be good enough?

I recall the moment

I decided to jump in.

Even if a million thoughts

Tried to persuade me to stop,

To shrivel up as I’d always done,

To cower in pure terror,

Chained down to my faults;

I jumped.

Not tentatively, but fiercely

Fueled by my soul, a wholehearted leap of faith,

Every effort I could muster.

And what for?

Just for this failure,

Everything I feared,

This massive gust of wind

Barreling towards my hopeful soul.

Oh, how simple it would be

To fall apart then and there,

To give in,

Tell my fear it was right about me.

But I tried, didn’t I?

Don’t I still have my faith?

God is here on my side.

And for that, I feel strength

In the midst of this torture.

A rough, strangled laugh

Rises up through the sobs

As I let the strength grow

And glow in my heart,

Turning this straw house

Into a brick fortress.