It started at a young age. I thought you knew!

Kick after kick, beaten after beaten

I ask for it to stop and you said no

Did you know all I ever wanted to have that love I thought I should get from you

Did you know it started with you mom and dad

I wanted a real family not a domestic family

I asked that you love me I asked that you care, but for so long I went unheard

Did you know that because it started with you I've been through hell and back

Did you know because of your selfishness I've been molested from the age of 10 to 15 from my own cousin, yet it went unnoticed because you didn't pay attention

I held this in for 11 years and you never knew

I thought parents was supposed to know their child

Mom you rather club than be a mother

Father when I needed you most you had others raising us

Did you know because of you I didn't know how to love myself first

I didn’t know where to go or even how to go ahead with my life

Did you know it wasn't until college that I found myself and I found out who I was

I bet you didn't even know that night I called you crying my eyes out at 4 in the morning I found out I was pregnant

Your words were get a fucking backbone because you didn't want to hear it

Mom I needed you and you shut me down before you could even find out

I wanted to know how to handle the situation how to go to him about it

I was too afraid to tell him, so I lied

I lied because I didn't know how to be a mother

Because I was afraid of the unknown

Because I was afraid that I would be a mother like you

Did you know that fear got short leaved and my child was taken from me yet again

They say God knows what is best for you

I guess he knew right now wasn't our time

And I'm sorry baby that you had to hear it like this

But, baby the thought of knowing you wanted to be a father hurt me more than anything

I'm sorry that it pained so much that I never took the step of telling you because I didn't know to come clean about it

I'm sorry that the tables has turned and I've become the liar

Just knowing the guilt you would have had gave me even more strength to keep it from you

I'm sorry because I fell coward to taking the easy way out and held that I lost our precious gift

Did you know that I lived with this hurt and this pain every day because I never spoke a word

A man finally showed me how to love myself and as well as showing me how to be love, and return I was deceitful to him by lying

How could you do this to me, your own flesh and blood

All I wanted was a family to call home

Men and women stop having children that you know you are not ready to take responsibility for

It took another man to show me how to love, how to care, and how to have a voice

Did you know today I vow to give it all back to you

I give back the pain, the hurt, the lies, and the torture

I give it all back to you because I found my power, I found my voice

I'm here

I'm standing

I'm finally loved

Did you know my past doesn't defined me

I've made it and I'm not done just yet