Dirty Pillows

Just between the crack within my curtains

The light of dawn peeks through

I feel its presence as if it grasp is reaching out to me

Trying to wake me up

What if it knew I never went to sleep

Would it still bother to wake me

If it knew that when it set in the day

When the moon took its spot

That I was fully awake

Would it feel betrayed it knew

Knew that I only ever told the moon?

The whirlpool within my head

The vortex of my innermost thoughts

Only being released in the dead of night

When all are sleeping

And I am alone with the moon

Would it sympathize for me

If it knew the moon only held the key

The key to my jailed mind in which my thoughts are trapped

Would it feel for me

If it heard my muffled cries through my pillow

If it saw my pillow case

Smeared with mascara sweat and tears

Maybe then it wouldn’t try to wake me

Maybe it would retreat from the crack within my curtain

Hold back its grasp

And let me sleep

But it doesn’t know

So each morning I will get up

Hide the complexity of my thoughts

With a mask of a smile

Put my pillow case in the hamper

Placing a new one in its place

So no one would see my dirty pillows