Disorders

Was it the 8 year loss? Maybe her death and the family of crushed dreams...

Mental issues.. Maybe? All the way from fetal stage,

Most likely genetics from the bloodline, ya Nerd.

Drama Queen, says Mom; Cry-baby, say the sister-

Quitter, says Dad; Lazy, says the family.

My friends though....

Fresh, realist, energetic, douchbag, problem and happy said the friends

Lame, quiet, cool, weird, and smart, said the classmates.

 What is the purpose of life and what is my purpose? Why am I pretending?

That I like people, that college is my only dream, or that am happy. 

How can I keep the persona going? How did I even start it?

I never belong, Im always sad, why does life and medicore success require- so much activity.

Been to therapy, but I hate talking. Been thinking of all the says and the said.

 Just note there is before and after.. The worst wins

Welp, life is gonna keep going so gotta do something.

Hopefully no meltdowns or freakouts, there is no signs

Clearly nobody knows my mind, I mean the can't know.

Pretending it is and push to the limits. Nothing wrong here

Nothing emotional.. Nothing mental