Distance

A hollow, empty numbness fills my soul,

gnawing at me from within, eating away

at the core of my being, reminding me

that I am nothing, and begging me to ask

Will I ever be anything?

I want to rebel against this feeling,

to push away the pain that got me here,

and forget the things that brought the pain.

I want to know again the happiness I had

the first time we connected with each other.

Not this cold, distant tension that we share

where he expects failure, so he doesn't try.

He doesn't want to drop the barriers

or open the door to let me in,

even when it rains outside.

I've tried to build bridges over the distance,

the gaping chasm between us,

that I so desperately want to cross,

to show him that I can be by his side

and be the strength and light he needs

to get through the darkness in his life.

I reach out to him in the night,

wondering if he can see me,

if he can hear my voice calling out to him.

Alone, either side is dangerous;

we could help each other.

I want to show him, but even I'm scared...

Scared that he'll deny and reject me.

All I can do is hold my hand out to him,

hoping that he takes it, and pulls me closer.