Do not pass me by...

It's coming, I can feel it, I can see my eyes getting watery. This feeling that I'm feeling is hot, warm and it stem my inner being. I'm trying Lord, I'm trying to maintain my balance, but I can't take this pain no more. I can't no longer wear this mask. When Lord, when will the pain stop? I keep on telling myself that my life is not going to be like this forever. I keep on pushing because if I dare to stop I'll fumble and crash really hard into the floor. I'm holding it in, the pain the fake smile and pretend. I'm trying to get myself together and be strong for myself because at the end of the day I'm all I got. It's hard holding everything in. Espcialy at an young age. It feel like I'm growing up to fast in a way that I missed out on being young. I can never relate to my generation because we have never walked in the same shoes. I can never feel what is like to really have a support group that have your back 100%. Now just thinking about it, it must be nice having someone there to run to when everything is falling apart.It must be nice having someone that always provide for you.Maybe one of these days I may know how it feel to be truly loved.