(Don’t) Love Me

“It’s okay.”

 

I can still feel it.

The way your lips touched mine.

Without meaning.

Without feelings.

I missed them.

Your kisses.

Your attention.

 

It hurts.

 

I saw it.

The way your eyes drifted to others.

Never straying to mine.

Never filled with the same spark.

Always dull.

Lifeless.

Loveless.

 

My heart.

 

You would say it.

Those three words.

Not to me.

Never to me.

To the others.

They always got your love.

I got your hate.

Your anger.

Always.

 

“You don’t have to love me.”

 

You gave me orders.

Never to be near you.

Never to hold hands.

Not in public.

We did not know each other.

They would get the wrong idea.

“We are cousins,” You would say.

You were embarrassed.

To be seen.

With me.

 

I can’t.

 

I was your puppet.

You pulled the strings.

And I obeyed your command.

You never loved.

Not me.

Never me.

I was your toy.

Something you could throw away.

 

Take it.

 

It’s all a game.

Of feeling.

Of pain.

Of love.

Of hate.

You are the king.

I’m your pawn.

Just a piece on your board.

 

I’m done.

 

I loved you.

More than anything.

I let you use me.

Hurt me.

If I got to be with you.

Nothing else mattered.

You didn’t feel the same.

 

“No one ever does.”

 

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