A drop of blood

I head up the stairs to my secret box under my bed my friend wasn't there, he was somewhere stray lead thinking that God is making a mockery of me till I spotted my trusty blade in deed I grip it and I felt the bright chi take its course through my vien I tighten up my arm and tie the string around it so with a twist of pain I stregthen my fore arm and but my blade against my skin, how cold just like this soon to be forgotten world, I envy the that it gets so low and now it sees me depart its spiteful embrace, I pull slowly back with the blade tho feel all this pain is what I lovely embrace, but I can't see blood jade the beautiful color or dark blue infuse with oxygen to be red, I say to the when I bleed I feel the need to be something I can not believe and yet there is no blood so I try again, no blood so I try again, no blood so I try again now I see that my rough skin is making a fool out of me then but I shall not be bestested by some mesly flesh no I will win that's when I go to my cabinet and grab the vodka and jin mother doesn't know I know that dad left these so I pour me a glass and knock back a couple of drinks plus the fact I took them with the tylenol extra stregth for an immediate reaction but somehow I feel death doesn't want to leave me with this chemical reaction so now I go back to my trusty friend and once again start to slit my skin oyes I feel the extasy of pain yet again in my system, now my room is dim the lights fade out, I can smell the droplet of blood running down my arm when momma comes home I hope she doesn't sound the alarm