Drowning in Cloudy Water

I was 17

when I realized I couldn’t swim

Jumping into new waters

Where my feet can’t touch

where I thought there was a lot

I guess there wasn’t so much

Where all I need to not drown

was just one person's touch

but now instead of water

I swallow my pride

only to realize that I was so blind

and the cloudy water wasn’t really water

it was my feelings on the inside

the water that hurt my lungs

was regret that went untouched

and now I’m sinking

and thinking

of how maybe

I shouldn’t have loved you so much