Dry cheeks

You try for an end. You pray for a sign. You yearn for something better. You cry for God to end your misery. You try to beat him to it. You make plans to end your suffering. You pray for better days. You endure the months of stress only for 2 months of freedom. During the day, you stare at the clock your brain becomes numb. During the night, you cry till your eyes can cry no more. When you awake you realize what you did the night before. Your eyes burn and your cheeks feel dry. You go to the bathroom you try to freshen up but you can't shake past how down you feel. Your brain feels numb yet still wounded. You try to tell yourself that you have hope. But hope doesn't seem real right now.