echoes of next time

September 28, 2013

Walking down a cracked road that never got a side walk.. Grasping the ghostly figment of what I hope to be my heart straggling beside me .. As the sun lowered into a pit of a red-orange & misty purple hue it shook hands with the ashy off white body of what used to be you. & just that quick everybody washed their hands of your memory , of your Fairwell kiss you never blew , but with each & every passing day I can never forget you.

I love you

I need you

Everyday I cry because I'm selfishly dying due to me not being able to live without you

My acid filled tears strip my face of what would've been your last kiss ..

My unsteady hands shake away your last touch..

My stubbornness can't wrap it's mind around EVER getting over loosing you..

There are random days where I sit up wallowing in my misery & soaking in a tub of gin & heartbreak. Tears slap me in the face like a virgin getting raped , like a mother with no children to nurture , like a grown woman whose still a snagga toothed little girl inside..

Because she's forever missing the one thing that kept her in tact & without you I'm slowly but surely unraveling , all the crazed thoughts , deranged intentions & vindictive actions are beginning to show they're face with every shot of the past. & everyone around me is starting to think I'm crazy .. But I'm not fucking crazy , I just need you back , my number one lady .. I just miss you baby

I need you back

Please come save me

As I walk down this cracked road alone I remember everything you hoped for me..

You were just about the only one who believed in me ..

& then you just up & left ..

I don't ever want the sun to set on the memory of your life because once it rises up again I fear that it'll leave a piece of you behind & within my lifetime I won't even know your name.

I won't know what it's like to hold your hand.

I fear that one day ill understand you leaving me & be content with not having you by my side as I straggle down the cracked streets of this world ..

I fear that ill be content with not having you again , my beautiful baby girl

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echoes of next time

kourtney95

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