elastic heart

here is what i know:

you loved me
and i you.
i wrote about you
as if you hung the moon in the sky.
as if you created a world of color 
a world of beauty.
a world for us.
 

and then you broke me
abruptly and heartless.
so i wrote about you
as if you burnt our entire world
with me gasping for air.
and you walking away without a care.

and then i met another boy
i thought maybe
just maybe he could rebuild me.
rebuild what we had.
but i did not write about him
like how i wrote about you.

and i knew i still loved you
still held onto the ash of us.
clinging to the crash of a world
with my selfish fingers

so i let the new boy go
before i did to him
what you did to me.

here's what i know:
i still love you
i think i always will
but i am learning how to build a new universe
where the song of my soul
beats to me
not another boy.

yes,
dear boy
i will always love you
but i know
i will be okay
i know
someday
i will be able to write about someone new
someone not you.