the endless night

of all the people i want to kill,

and your name is pretty close to the top of the list,

the person i want to kill most of all:

Myself.

I yearn for the journey into fucking oblivion,

I yearn to stop feeling the pain

that you pumped into my blood

like some poisonous IV drip

i want my throat to feel sore against the pills

because of the hundreds i will swallow

i would do anything

to feel less empty, less broken, less shattered

i want to organize my items

line by line

and burn them all

because every fucking thing i own

has a fucking trace of you.

i’ll never get away from the fucking pain you caused me

i cannot outrun it i cannot fucking kill it

i am at the mercy of the pain you put in my fucking heart

so my final solution,

is to just cut the damned thing out.