Fear of Love

I never opened up to someone

afraid of being hurt.

I kept them away with fake smiles

and a simple I'm okay.

I am afraid of people.

I am afraid of myself.

I am afraid of having my heart shattered 

like my fragile mind.

I tend to give into fear.

I always end up in tears.

I always become the victim of myself

by giving into other's desires and wishes

because they are afraid as I.

But the moment you said goodbye 

in my heart there was a knife.

I couldn't breathe and I froze.

I was afraid to lose what I had lost long before.

I was afraid to lose a person 

who's could make me smile,

who's thoughts and care

made me worthwhile.

I was afraid to lose

someone who mattered to me,

somone of whom I care,

someone who was there for me

when I felt upset and scared.

I'm terrified to fall in love

especially with someone I barely know,

but here my heart is pounding,

my butterflies flutter,

and my mind is at a loss for words.

I can't let my fears control me,

and the happiness she brings me.

And I'll my best to keep my fears from hurting her.