The feelings deep inside

I was little

I was sick

my throat was closed

I couldn't breathe

I couln't talk.

I was small,

I was bright,

my vocal cords

worked fine, but I was scared,

I was shy,

so when I was small I couldn't talk.

I was a pre-teen,

I thought I was all that,

but one moment of self-expression,

a moment of attitude,

got me a scream,

got me a slap,

so after that

I couldn't talk.

Now that I am older

now that I am tall

I still fear,

I'm still shy;

I am hurt,

it's too much

too many emotions,

all at once.

So i can't breathe,

I can't talk.

But, I can write.

inside poetry

I can cry,

I can laugh,

I can be myself

I can lead my life.

Through poetry,

I can let go

off all that is inside

and feel myself

coming apart

with fantasies

of what could be

and what really is

within my mind.

Poetry is my freedom,

poetry is my strife,

poetry allows me

to keep myself together

and not fall apart.

This is why I write.