The Fight

It's hit me again like a ton of bricks

the sadness slices through me like razorblades

Feeding the hunger in my heart with unbearable hate

A hate worse than anything anyone could ever say to me

A hate for myself

A deep one

What am I doing here?

What's my purpose?

Is a person like me deserving of happiness?

Am I worthy of love?

It's the worst loneliness to feel when your not alone at all

Shut me out with your silence

Push me deep in a hole with your eyes

Do whatever you need to do to make yourself feel superior

I can take it

You could be suffocating me with your bare hands

and I would still with my last gasping breath say I love you

and with whatever willpower I had left

I'd give you a smile before I go

I wouldn't want you to feel unloved

I wouldn't want you left alone with my hateful eyes

They would just be blank from all the love you sucked dry from them

I will search for you still in every lifetime I ever get blessed to live

Even if the ending is always the same one

You rescued a damsel in distress