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find me in a grassy field


kiss me softly

with your spirit when you sleep

let's slip into warm bliss and

drift away

caress my hips, hold my hand

you feel like silk, like butterfly wings 

lips like honey nectar

scents and smells, uncommon sense

inscence and sensitive things

you remind me of dark chocolate

and milky galaxies 

find me in a grassy field

where wind chants

and earth sways

star children prance

flowing sea green waves  

let's have a picnic on a rolling cloud

near flowers and bees and fruitful trees

let's talk about energy and sound

run away with me

soak in my sun

let's find infinity

in a grassy field

 

 

 

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Comments (5)

QV
<p>Don't worry, I am guilty of the same thing :) Try mixing metaphors or juxaposing images that have no relations, its an exercise in imagination. I will gladly read your future pieces. QV</p>
amber_lehua
<p>Thank you :) I respect your criticism, I definitely will be more careful of the cliches I don't like them either but they seem to always sneak in there. Feel free to critique more of my poems now and in the future.&nbsp;</p>
QV
<p>Wonderful and refreshing work :) The scene is pastoral, innocent, yet I detect the desire to "loose" the constrains&nbsp;("caress my hips"). I greatly enjoyed the placing of two unrelated images togther in lines 10 and 11 ("dark chocolate...milky way"),&nbsp;the&nbsp;effect is very sensuous.&nbsp;If I may offer a suggestion, be careful, if not afraid of cliches, they can shiftly turn an original piece into an unorignal piece. Keep on writing and sharing. QV</p>
amber_lehua
<p>I appreciate that so much! Thank you :)</p>
hamdi.mohamed001
<p>I love this!!!!!</p>

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