Finding my voice bc for

Finding my voice bc for so long , I was mute , I gasp for air and inhale the depths of the wounded souls around me , and exhale the agony ..I drept of courage that is now gone Back to the shell I've succumbed myself in It's safe here I'm protected by false hopes and make believe realitys Fear is not fear here Fear is safety that protects me from the possibility of rejection Fear is my friend Don't do that they say Don't go outside , stay in. Where nobody can hurt you I palm my fears for safekeeping And let them Cascade over me like pillars in the wind Like freshly ground coffee at 8am Like hearing yes when you expected no I'm safe here Tucked into this cacoon I've made for myself I'm safe Anxiety tugging at my heart but that's long gone Somewhere far away isolated from the rest of me Because my heart does stupid things and makes dumb choices because she has a mind of her own I tell her no and she doesn't listen Then I'm forced to clean up the disaster of her weeping soul Fear is now her protector