First Love

Dear First Love,

You are the first person to ever teach me to love, you are what made me realize my inner strength, you are my rock...well you were.We were young when we fell, but that didn't matter because we had so much love to give. Your blue eyes and goofy personality kept my darkest thoughts at bay. You were my solace through the rain, my Han Solo to my Leia, my "I love you" and "I know". You and I were a team for so long we just lost our way, well at least I know I did because I left. I can't explain, maybe it was the strain of our families that broke me. I abandoned the forever I promised we'd share. I kept moving forward but you stayed, I was embedded in your heart and you would not let me go. Until you did....you finally let me go and I realized you had never departed from my heart, not fully anyway. I am devastated because you, my first love, are the only person who ever really understood me. I abandoned my promise and you did the same, guess that means we won't be best friends for life. I can't blame you though, did I really expect you to let me continue to appear in your life then disappear until I got my feelings together? I'm happy you're happy, I really am, I'm just sad it isn't me putting that smile on your face anymore. You said we never know what will happen in the future but do not wait for you, is it dumb that I still want to? You are the first boy to ever show me the love that I dreamt about as a little girl, you may have moved on but I'm forever stuck. The quote I live by is "If you love it, set it free, if it comes back it is yours to keep, if it doesn't, it was never yours in the first place". Continue to bless the world with your intelligence and humor, my first love, and when you are ready I am here.

Love Dasia