Forbearance

Wash your hands before dinner, hold back your hair in a braid, no elbows on the table, "why are you so unstable?", don't raise your voice at your mother, don't ever disrespect your father, don't cry in front of company, be a good little girl -- sit quietly, cross your ankles when you sit, stop slouching, other kids have it worse don't throw a fit, don't speak unless you're spoken to, she's a doctor shell take good care of you, wash your hands before you pray, don't wear black on a holy day, make sure to clean your plate, but don't you dare put on weight, speak louder don't be shy, be a lady don't raise your voice, you're a human but you're not, you're have feelings but they forgot, study harder, read better, be better, be stronger; you're a women now, stand taller, you're not dying you're growing stronger, put down the remote, pick up your pen, pick up your homework, study again; This is how you take care of others, this is how you learn to be a mother, this is how you forget yourself, and this is how you fall apart; This is how you learn to bleed, to suffer quietly, do not cry, you're not weak, Never taught to cope and grieve, never learned how friends became enemies, blood is thick but blood is weak, never learned to trust easily, never learned that love could break, never learned what thoughts could make, never learned how your own mind could betray you, thinking it okay when its not, but it didn't matter what you thought, hold your hands so they don't shake, keep your heart so it wont break, "I don't know what is happening" nobody knows it'll be fine, take your medicine the pain will end, you're not okay but just pretend, pray for people so they'll be safe; This is how you become an adult, this is how you learn to grieve; This is how you ask for help, and this is how you learn to heal; This is how you put yourself back together again, Humpty Dumpty, jaded but clean; This is how you hide the scars, forget but never forgive, forgive but never forget, this is how you learn to move on, This is how you find your strength, bear your burdens gracefully.