The Forever Fall

Emotions chase me.

I run and I run until my lungs bleed and beg me to stop

I run until I'm trapped.

It's the emotions or the cliff

I turn to face death, sadness, depression, and life.

I look them in their pitiful eyes.

I think what would I be missing.

Everything is hopelesss.

Tears running down my fce left and right.

"Goodbye" I simply say.

I fall backwards without even thinking about hesitating.

The rush spreads from my head to my hips; from my hips to myto my feet.

My heart falls through my chest not realizing what I've done.

I can't take it back. I can't just turn around or turn back time.

I immediately think of the future.

People will look for they eventually give up.

My family will not stop looking for me.

The look on their faces are horrible.

They will find my body.

Relieved, but unhappy.

Shocked, but calm.

In tears, but dry.

I snap out of it.

It's too much pressure, too much pain.

I didn't mean to cause it.

I just wanted to be released from the barriers.

From the chains and the staredowns

and the putdowns and the pain the constant pain that I constantly feel against my skin.

Released from the pain that is constantly being put in my head.

I didn't want this at all; I just wanted out.

I just wanted freedom.

The pressure knocks me out cold.

I am now of no use to this cruel, bitterful world.

Then I wake up my heart thumping, head sweating; It was just a dream. 

The noise of my breath fills the room.

I'm alive. I'M ALIVE!

I can't believe it.

I'm relieved.

I don't have any guilt to die with me.

My drop never ends.

I will be forever falling.

By: Lois Lillard