Forgetful Memories

I've stepped into a memory, a very painful one at that. I see every mistake I made, hear every vulgar word I spat. The last time I was in this room, the decisions that I made, All make my stomach ache, these memories I wish could fade, From my mind, from my heart, from my life, from my past. With all these thoughts weighing on me how much longer can I last? What exactly was the point of those empty, vain ideas? To completely warp my innocence while I selfishly stole his... Did I take into account that I could never forgive myself? That it would completely ruin my spiritual and emotional health? Did I not realize that I was causing pain and grief Or did I just ignore it to get the "love" I so desperately need? Why can I not forget this, why can't it just go away? Because God told me in the beginning, the consequences I must pay. He told me not to go there, but instead I chose to run. I tried to do it my way, create safety in temporary fun. I gave into temptation, a dark and lonely past, Now I just wish to forget, to be free from this memory at last. As I watch this awful memory play, it's coming to an end, And in the form of Saving Grace I see a Loving Friend, Who sees all my decisions, my failures, and my mess, But casts them down forever in the Sea of Forgetfulness. This friend doesn't keep records of all the wrong I've done, But instead forgives and loves me as I choose to follow The Son. This forgetful friend is Jesus, my amazing Lord Above, Who pressed "Pause" on this memory to remind me of His love. I wish I was so forgetful as my closest, dearest friend, But I'm glad I can remember that He's brought me from where I've been!