Forgive my Atrocities

Sunset slowly paves to darkness In my mind I experience A darkness unprecedented and my soul has been dented slowly crushed and disintegrated hopes ground turned to fine particle dust that flies away at the whistle of this windy storm The floors of my haunted mind,creak, weakly under the dead weight held by my conscience The memories reek of a painful existence..am not truly living am only existing the memory holds a knife stabbing my heart with waves of a degenerate past I can only cry under dark and smile to disguise my tears and my fears Even to the keenest of eyes the twinkle in my star seemed to dwindle fast along with the hopes and dreams that I could be vindicated Holding on to hope,by its last strings before the rope snaps to smithereens and the destitution infused within hopelessness while hopefully hoping that am not standing at the gates of desperation In destruction and brokenness,I look for a hints of Jesus in my darkness I'm seeking his light endlessly asking Him ceaselessly praying..I know he got his ears open I know he can hear me howling I pray pray pray and I pray a little bit more I just need so much of Jesus I just need forgiveness for my atrocities... freedom from my daunting memories