Forgiveness

Alone and deserted in the unknown

Left alone with what life thought were essential to my survival

My insecurities

Deepest fears

And worst of all my thoughts

Three loyal companions

All trapped not just with me

But inside me

On an island I’ll call my own

As the shade begins to grow heavy

Off goes a light

Reminiscing in luxuries I once had

Like when I would look at the emaciated me

The image I had chosen at the time

Because I looked at feasts as fuel

Used to ignite the acidity of the contents

That were taking shelter within me

Now I’m the only thing completely exposed

Using solely the canopies of the wilderness

To cover the markings I imprinted in the sand

Yet nothing can encrust the designs engraved onto what little skin I have left

I wanted to be alone

I wanted to be deserted

I’m trapped on this island to keep everyone safe

Because I get satisfaction from harming myself from the inside out

One day I’ll find a way off  

And back to a normal life

But right now I need this time to search the depths of my soul

I need to learn how to forgive myself

Before I expect you all to do the same