Four Walls

I tell time with houses 

we moved from city to city 

four walls become boxes of memories 

wrapped in tangled messy ribbons

recently I started to pull at the bows 

Walking into the past 

becomes scary when the door clicks shut

foot meets threshold 

breath escapes

time feels frozen here 

Every bad decision 

faces I can not unsee

hands and words and echoes 

etched into these walls 

that I shrink down against

Cracks in its foundation

matching scars of my own

both still fighting to stand 

but only one of us

has healed with time 

I take solace in

the fresh paint that’s still not dry

yellow walls now blue

scared girl now a woman

my new coat not just aesthetic 

I found a new home in my body

my pillars now sturdy

since I learned to trust my legs

long hallways of confusion 

replaced with comfort in my head 

Pulling out the driveway 

I see the house as whole

and the welcome mat 

looks more like thank you

as I turn onto my road