To Frendship, from Loneliness

What's the point of having friends?

You try being relatable

Doesn't work

You try being nice and kind

Doesn't work

You try being funny

Doesn't work

I wish I could have that friendship

That everyone has, but

To do this

You need a friend

And I don't have "true friends"

I know people, I talk to people

But outside of school

I don't speak to them

I tend to speak more with the void of silence

But it isn't the same

I see people have fun

But I see me not

Am I a malfunction?

Is there something wrong with me?

Am I meant to not engage with people socially

I want to feel

I want to love

I want to have people

People who are my friends

My only friend is my mind

And the characters in my stories

But I need real friends

They say the friends you make in college

Will be better than the friends from high school

But what if you don't have friends

How can you get better friends

From loneliness

I look at others and wonder

What is wrong with me?

Do I just repel people?

I don't mean to

I try to blend in with people

But I don't blend well

Like water and oil

People claim that I'm their friends

But we don't do anything

I am forgotten

Not just by some

But by all

I am overlooked

They say that you can be the smart friend

Didn't work

They say you can be the smart-ass friend

Didn't work

They say you can be the salty friend

Didn't work

I'm nothing

Ununpentium is known more than I am

And no one knows what Ununpentium is

Be nicer they say

Be friendlier they say

Be relatable they say

Be more open they say

Be funnier they say

Do you know what I say

...

It doesn't work

It doesn't matter

It doesn't mean anything

Friendship is for the people who can

Be social

I...I can't experience true friendship

I tell people to forget about me

Because it's easier to forget

Than to remember a nobody

I can't have friends that even

Isolation and Loneliness don't want to

Be my friends