Full

I refuse to put my hair up this week. I have bruises on my neck and throat and shoulders. It hurts, oh God it hurts. I was not in the right state of mind. I was mentally dead. I told him to let go, he laughed. Why don't people take me seriously? I didn't know whether to scream or giggle. Does that make me crazy? People say, "I swear if a man ever put his hands on me..." I was one of them. When it happened I completely froze, I didn't fight back. How could I with his finger on my pressure points and his hands around my neck? Squirming, attempting to escape while his grip got harder and harder. When he let go, I didn't say anything. My body went numb. But now, Now I'm furious. Reality has set in. Fuck him. Fuck all the guys that only want to talk to me not because they are interested in me, only interested in what they can put in me! There's someone willing to give me all the affection and happiness I deserve. And that person will get every bit and morsel of my love he deserves. No, I am not a bitter black woman, I'm just full.