A Game Of Words

The words I want to say
Are ones I hope you want to hear
 
I am here now
I am with you
I love you
I miss you
You are beautiful
 
 
I write to you for hours
Yet we do not speak
For I have tried and failed
And been abandoned thrice
 
My fingers hover
I contemplate
My fingers quiver
I breathe heavy
The fog sets in
I lose all mind
 
How to choose the words to say
What is yet left unsaid
 
It is a game of words
And you are the dealer
Rolling me fixed dice
 
Every thought overthought
Every stroke calculated
I want to be with you
I want this to be simple
You wanted this too you said
Now it seems you want all but
 
 
Beloved
What became of us? 
Lovers estranged in a moment
 
I want to end this age of silence
I want to be with you
I want to talk to you
I want to hold you
I want you to want this too
 
But most of all
I want what you want
 
My fear is that you do not feel it
That you pay no mind to this great divide
That you do not even recognize this silence
That I hardly cross your mind
 
You are always on my mind
 
 
I have learned to be content
It is a truly hard thing to be
But my love was always about you
Never about me
 
Let me by your side
It's a side I'll always take
 
One of the hardest parts
Of being worlds apart
Is that you still hold my heart