Geography

Wed, 01/22/2014 - 15:03 -- amrg3

I’m unstable

The earth shakes in me like a thousand drumbeats

Drumbeats that quiver and reverberate through my bones

The tectonics shake and the supports fall out

My geography is no open plane; it’s a mess of valleys and hills

Craters and mountains, and rivers made of salt water

Supplied by the stream of tears that run through my thoughts

And empty into the basin of nothingness that I have let myself become

Words do nothing but open up volcanoes and unleash the storms

There’s nothing holding me strong, nothing holding me steady

It’s like the arms that I once relied on for strength and support

Got swept away in a current of their own

Or never grew the foundations and courage to step into the eye of the storm And hold on

Or the eyes that saw me when I was invisible stopped taking the time to search out my face through all the chaos

And the person to whom I felt a belonging and a connection with started up the storm

Then left me to its’ devices

To float out on an open sea full of sharks waiting for blood

Or teenagers waiting to rip you open and expose you for something you’re not

And fight this battle alone

But I promised myself I’ll survive, I’ll stabilize these tectonics

And I’ll find a way to be whole again

 

(copyright 2013 AMRG3)

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