The Grand Flog

I sing of a feat known by few The day is young with the morning dew The bravest of men shall take on the day For there is a fire-breathing dragon to slay The beast is mighty and filled with rage It’s sick and tired of its useless cage It has no weakness, no Achilles heal Its heart is made of stainless steal Tis’ the dragon they have sworn to take down For it has bullied their people all over town It has taken the proud and engulfed the weak It has terrorized all and defeated the meek Golf is the name of the beast they say Not a game as simple as the one called Croquet Only those with the mental stamina can keep up 18 holes of trying to get a ball in a cup So the dance begins on the very first tee Keeping the nerves together is the only key The dragon does have its own little plot It plays mind games with you on every shot A drive to the fairway and a chip to the green My oh my this greedy beast is mean Maybe a one putt or two at the most Three means a bogie and with that you’re toast The dance continues, 17 to go Don’t get in a hurry you must take it slow Be careful with every step that you make Just one bad shot can cause the beast to shake 5 holes in and the game turns around I’ve awakened the beast with a meager sound My ball does jump away to the beach A par on this hole is now out of reach On this hole a bogie I claim After that I think I’m out of the game It’s the beginning of my three hole curse Then the weather changes for the worse The clouds a cover of dark and gloom I hear the thunder with its great boom The bird path is dark without a hint of blue The lightning does strike on it its cue The wind does howl like a wolf to the moon The rain does fall like a great monsoon It’s bitterly cold and I start to shake It will all be over with one fine mistake The breaker of trees takes down a few good men But I stand strong once again I shall not let the beast defeat me now So I walk to my ball and begin to bow I think to myself on the final hole I won’t let the fire-breather take my soul I will birdie this and defeat him now I hope and pray with this spoken vow I hit the drive to the center of the park As the wind it does continue to bark Close to the green my ball does lie The beast is angry my oh my A chip on the green and I’m safe at this time But my putt could be as sour as a lime My heartbeat does echo as I stand at my ball The read is unclear, it’s a tough one to call I see the hole and imagine the putt As it moves quickly on top the short cut The beast moves my ball to the right side It tries as it does to mess with my pride The ball falls in and the game is done I must say the task was not at all fun But I beat the beast so now I’m free Tis mine, this oh so sweet victory.