Grief

I'm dangling on the rail of a hospital bed Clinging to you and the life you have left and Somewhere in between hushed breaths and the unnerving hum of the air mattress I reach my hands to yours to try to heal myself and you but my helpless hands have no power to heal so they hold your hands to feel Feeling too much Grief I'm an extrovert stuck in an introvert's body where existential mind wars wage on In My D-Day I'm a weathered piece of wood washed up along the frothy shoreline Splinters digging into my skin with every movement, every thought, Just scrap wood with a scrap heart Slamming into the shore The cymbal waves are your soundtrack and oh, it is heavenly as You storm up the beach like life You are life beyond my years You are colors of wisdom and love All this time I thought you were bulletproof I thought we had more life and colors But the cymbals crash like bullets and I’m screaming white noise In an instant you bleed out into my soul The albatross hangs on my heart Beauty fades with gasped breaths All your beauty Eight months later and I'm still blood stained scrap wood screaming on the shore to the score of your waves "Come back,” please “Come back.”