Growing Up as an Adult

Surrounded by family,

All older,

Taking care of me happily

Forcing me to grow up

To make them proud.

It never seemed enough.

I remember playing,

Seldomly,

With baby dolls.

I was a mother.

I remember caring for,

Everyday,

My friends and teammates.

I was a mother.

I remember loving,

Unprotected,

My boyfriend.

I was a mother.

A woman but still a little girl.

My mother still made my appointments,

But she couldn't make this one.

She couldn't know.

She doesn't know.

No one does.

I remember going,

Petrified,

Into Planned Parenthood.

I was no longer a mother.

No longer a child in me

Or within me.

I am allowed to choose

What I do in life

And don't have to

Live up to the desires

Of my family.

I remember realizing,

Confidently,

I control my life