Growing Up Conservative

When I was 12, The youth pastor gave every young girl an egg

And he told us to throw the egg on the ground

Eeagerly, the adolescent women forced the egg on the hard earth

The floor became a murky white

the yellow yolk bringing bright contrast to the mess.

"That is how men view women who have been sexually impure" He says.

The boys in the room,

whom previously watched with jealousy,

nodded in agreement.

I became scared of my sexuality-

Scared to become undesireable.

And then, only a few years later, I found myself

Staring at the ceiling as a man used me like a dish rag.

Lord, I said no. I promise-I prayed. 

I became scared of my sexuality-

Scared to become undesireable.

It took two years, and a few months into college,

To find my own god.

Goddess. 

And It was my own body.

My own consent.

And I became proud of my own sexuality.

Proud to have found the shameless power it weilds inside 

my soul.