January, the new year started.
I still kept to myself.
February, the days became colder.
As I became to be.
March, I met my best friend.
My days became more adventurous.
April, I met a boy in a different light.
My best guy friend of four years, newly lover.
May, my life was ethereal.
I had friends who loved me,
a boy who cared for me,
family who supported me,
I loved life.
June, my junior year came to an end.
Along with my desire to hold up a happy front.
Friends were drifting, the boy gave up,
and my family had no clue.
July, welcoming the warmth that came with summer.
My birth month.
Yet I didn't feel the warmth within me.
August, before my last year of high school started.
I busied myself to distract me from feeling alone.
September, school started.
I put on a mask that resembled contentment.
As much as I tried not to, misery still consumed me.
October, I went through school how I always did.
School, study, sleep, repeat.
November, realization came about.
I would never be happy,
not if I didn't reach out.
December, I forgave those who might've wronged me.
Love is the best thing I can give.
I will not let my past experiences shape me into something that the world
has enough of.
Bitterness and hatred.
January, 2017. I reach out to people, I say yes to acceptable adventures.
I smile more.
I engage in genuine kindness.
I laugh at the silliest things.
I'm beginning to fall in love with being alive,
I'm finally happy.
My growth in a year.